Just testing the waters...

For the past few years I have eschewed the idea of New Years' Resolutions, opting instead for what I refer to as The List. Until my 30th year, the concept was to add as many items to the list as I was years old. I decided that 30 was enough. So there we go... 30 items to be completed at some point during the year - a To Do List of sorts, or if you prefer, a short term Bucket List. And the last item on the List is always Make a List for the next year.

The 2011 List, you might wonder, was as follows:

1. Run the Vancouver Sun Run.

2. Run the Scotia Bank 1/2 Marathon.

3. Boudoir Photos

4. Pay off 1/2 of my Line of Credit.

5. Invest in stocks.

6. Take 15 days vacation.

7. Do the 2nd Annual Mother's Day Weekend.

8. Drink a case of champagne for no special reason at all.

9. Visit the Okanagan.

10. Visit the Farm (yes, that Farm)

11. Visit Cold Lake

12. Renovate the kitchen.

13. Attend a Book Club.

14. Visit Alex's new loft.

15. Visit Wreck Beach.

16. Resubscribe to the Arts Club.

17. Visit the Museum of Anthropology.

18. Learn to use Adobe Photoshop.

19. Take a Photography Class.

20. Find wall appliqués.

21. Go skating at Robson Square.

22. Go horseback riding.

23. Visit the Gulf Islands on the Boat.

24. Telephone Eve.

25. Floss.

26. Organize my storage locker.

27. Visit Seattle.

28. Start boxing again.

29. Hike the Chief.

30. Make a list for 2012.

I can't say that I have ever completed every item on any given list. Things change, things become no longer relevant as the year goes on, sometimes items on the List are replaced with other items, sometimes items are moved over to the next year's list. This year I was not so good with the financial things, and I finally gave up the notion that I will ever be a runner. My hip just does not allow it. But I did go back to training and to boxing and yoga and I tested out Zumba (and loved it) and I am well on my way to being fitter than I ever have been before. I did not hike the Chief, but I did make my way out to Calgary to hike in the Rockies with my good friend Jf. I did have Boudoir Photos taken - an experience that was one of the most liberating, confidence building of my life. The wall appliqués were an error in judgment. That's not going to happen. The kitchen renovation did happen, and it is so beautiful I almost cried when I saw it. I did not call Eve. But I am going to New York in May, and... who knows... there's still a few weeks left in the year. I made it about half way through that case of Champagne. For no special reason. That one was a great idea. It served to remind me that sometimes life itself is worth celebrating.

There are no rules beyond the golden rules of goal setting: specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-targeted. Sometimes as simple as read a certain book, or visit a certain place, take a certain class, etc. Sometimes the lists are more about emotional development, other times more about intellectual development. The reason for the List is that I hope to never become complacent. It reminds me that we should keep learning, keep discovering, keep moving forward, and sometimes it reminds me to revisit parts of my life that have fallen, accidentally or intentionally, by the wayside. And it is with this latter thought in mind that I have returned to Commanding Catharsis. It started last week when I reset my password and revisited old posts. Revive the Blog is on the List for 2012.

It is amazing to me that this blog, at one time very important and dear to me, lay dormant for 4 years, but here I am. I don't expect much of myself at first; the reason I wrote this blog in the first place was for introspection and I realize that, sadly, I don't really do much of that any more. It's a way of thinking that is, admittedly, rusty. But here's my first step back. It's good to be back.